I have really missed doing the blogs. I had a great one not so long ago but personal problems I was having in my life sent me spiraling out of control and I deleted it. It was something I regretted not long after because it was my outlet. It was my personal journal. It was my life.
But no more. I am back and I am happy! No matter what I am going through in my life I know without a doubt my life is good. I have a terrific family, my incredible son and a wonderful friend in NV. But there is one more in my life who has meant so much and that is Michael, my best friend, my strength, my one and only, my forever and always......Simply, the love of my life.
While I was at my lowest in the last couple of weeks, everyone mentioned above did everything they could to help me get my strength back and become even stronger than I ever thought possible and for that I say 'Thank You'!!! Everything all of you have done for me means the world and I will never forget it...... I promise you that.
Recently, I have had to really look at myself and decide what was most important to me. Anyone who has done that knows how truly hard it is to sit back and examine yourself underneath a microscope, not leaving anything unturned. These last few weeks were in fact the hardest 2 weeks of my entire life but now that its all over I am moving forward and will never look back again.
Unfortunately, I shut everyone who meant something to me out of my life during this time and that is what saddens me most of all. I listened to no one except someone who did nothing but lie and manipulate me in the worst of ways. And to think I allowed it to happen.
During those couple of weeks I received a package in the mail that made it all so clear. When I pulled the package out of my mailbox I immediately ran into my bedroom where I could be alone and opened it. Tucked inside were the following items: A letter, A very unique Zippo lighter and a quaint little box. I opened up the little box and gazed upon the smoothest sand I have ever seen and some sea shells.
Michael, thank you for sending me these and reminding my darkened mind of what is truly important in my life. I love you so much.... You saved me from myself when I needed it most and for that I will always be thankful. Always know it was never you that I doubted, only myself. Getting this package sent my mind back to when you were here with me. Every second we were together flashed before my eyes in a matter of seconds..... It made me feel safe, warm, comfortable and most of all loved! Now as you have said to me so many times lately, 'Let's get this party started!' cuz I am more than ready....
So rest assured everyone, I am back and I am happy... Life is good!