Ice Storm of 2007

Winter has decided to slam into us again this year. It's funny because every 4 to 5 years we seem to get hit with a major ice storm! The last one was in November of 2002. During that particular storm we were without electricity for 10 days. It was truly a hard thing to go through.

Luckily, this time is no where near as bad! There are only a couple of similarities this time, the sound of the tree limbs snapping and the off and on flashing of transformers blowing up in the middle of the night. I have to admit as scary as it is to see, it is quite beautiful! The sky lights up with a brilliant blue and then you hear a surge in the power, everything flickers and either you lose your lights or they come back on. You just never know...

This year, I have managed to keep my electricity. I have heard it is because we are on the same circuits as the fire station next door so I am very thankful. Although this morning we kept losing the power and we lost our phone for about 5 hours. My sister and my parents aren't more than 2 minutes from me and they have been without power since 5:30 this morning. They have all decided to check into hotels for the night. I am extremely thankful for not having that expense. I offered to let them crash here but they want their privacy and I cannot blame them.

Tonight is supposed to be another brief round of the stuff. It has been raining all day long and it should be freezing so there should be quite a bit of ice come tomorrow morning. So driving to work tomorrow should be loads of fun!

Well I am off, but I will leave you with this poem I found and some pictures I took off of my balcony this afternoon! I love the way the ice looks on the trees... You would never guess something so peaceful and beautiful could be so deadly...

An ice storm in the night
Reveals in morning light
A dazzling, wintry sight
Of frozen droplets bright

That cling to shrubs and trees
And glisten where they freeze –
A sight that’s sure to please
The one who looks and sees.

Still others will complain
About the freezing rain;
Indeed it is a bane
And something of a pain

For those who slip and slide
And wobble side to side
Or cannot get a ride –
Their patience can be tried!

But soon it will be past;
The thaw will come in fast.
The ice just cannot last.

~By Mary T. Hoffman

Have a fantastic Week Everyone!

Blah...

Okay so I have disappeared for a brief time but I am back. :)

I have been sick over the last few days. Not just me but my family has been sick too. Everything from vomiting and diarrhea to double pneumonia and ear infections. I have had to deal with the 1st two which has made life very unpleasant. I hate throwing up more than anything in the world. It gives me a horrid headache.

So over the last few weeks life has just been life. Nothing exciting or new. Well my son did turn 14 a couple of weeks ago. Damn that makes me feel old :) All he wanted was a bunch of Mizzou stuff so that is exactly what he got. And then he got to go to the movies with some of his friends. He was happy though and that's all that matters.

I am just ecstatic though. My son has been doing great in school! Last year this time he was failing everything but with all of the changes in our lives over this past year he has improved greatly. A's and B's. He did have 2 C's but I can deal with those! Life is good in that respect!

Here are a couple of pictures of my nephews on Santa's lap.




I love seeing screaming kids on Santa's lap :) It reminds me of a picture of me and my sister. She was screaming her head off while I was looking perturbed! I need to find that picture cuz its a classic!

Well that's about all for now. I am going to head for my couch and stare at my tv as I feel like complete crap! Take care everyone!

The Things You See....

For me, driving to work is always interesting. It's mainly because my drive to work involves making my way through heavy congested traffic but also it's due to the fact I drive 40 minutes just to get there.

I always manage to see something which makes me laugh or shake my head. It doesn't matter if its the couple screaming at each other or the single guy who has a finger knuckle deep planted in his nose. It doesn't matter what it is, there is always something to see.

Yesterday was no exception. Unfortunately, My Michael was sick so I made the trek all-by-my-lonesome which I hate. I get so use to having someone there that when he isn't it drives me a little crazy. Especially when there is road construction everywhere with those annoying signs that say "Progess in Process" to indicate they are actually doing more than just making the drive unbearable! Whatever....

Anyway, I am about half-way to work when this huge flatbed truck with junk stacked in the back (the stack was a good 8 or 9 feet high mind you) suddenly loses control of its load and shit goes flying all over the interstate. Everything from metal to wood went everywhere. That's when the road became a little game of Dodge-Junk. Swerve to avoid hitting shit! If I would have gotten points, I would have felt trapped in a video game. It was a little scary. I can't lie about that.

A couple of minutes later I see this white car coming up ahead of me weaving back and forth in front of me. So I think, "Okay, get another lane over to get away from this guy!" Well when I get up beside the car, I look over and see something I have never ever seen while driving. There to my right was a man probably 65 years old, no hands on the steering wheel at all, playing a trumpet! Yes, I did say playing a trumpet! Both hands were seriously on this instrument and he was literally playing it! I only wish his window and mine would have been down so I could have yelled something but he probably wouldn't have noticed anyway since he didn't seem to notice HE WAS DRIVING A CAR!!! Crazy I tell you! Crazy!!!

Then 5 minutes later I am stuck in traffic. They closed 2 lanes of the 3 lane interstate for construction. I HATE THAT! So what did I do? Got off at the next exit and took the back roads to work.

My drive home was no different, well except there was no shit flying at my car and no trumpet playing old guy. Just dodging assholes who are so hell-bent on getting home they don't care about basically running people off the road.

But my conclusion was this. I should not have driven yesterday. I should have stayed home. I avoided accident after accident and it made me a little nuts.

Now I am about to get behind the wheel again and I am hoping today is a much better drive than yesterday!

To Feel Special

The hardest thing about being in a relationship is remembering to always keep the fire burning and alive. Always give that person a simple reminder that they are in your life because you want them there but most of all, because you love them.

Reminders are simple. They don't have to cost money. I am not talking about going out and buying presents like jewelry or roses. There are so many small things you can do which only require thought and everyone knows putting thought into something means so much more than buying something.

I love My Michael. Last night he sat down on the couch with me and painted my toenails. It made me feel so special and loved. It was a sweet and simple way of saying 'Hey! I love you!' What could be better than that?

He did a fantastic job too!!!

Remember, things done for someone with nothing more than your time and thought mean more to someone than anything else in the world. :)

Michael and I always try to do these types of things for each other. The countless love letters and Poetry we have written to each other speaks volumes. The millions of 'I Love You's' scribbled on a piece of paper and slipped to each other when they weren't expecting it could wallpaper a room. Once I even made him a word find filled with words representing the both of us. And how much did any of this cost??? NOTHING except time and energy :)

And one more thought, never forget to smile.....

Love is fantastic so never take it for granted! Always do the simple things and that love will last a lifetime and beyond....

Thank God...

Tis Friday.. Tis the end of a very long week!!! Thank God!!!

For us unholy bill collectors it's also the end of the business month which means only a few more hours to collect that money and put ourselves in the position of receiving that bonus check in October....

Thank God...

To celebrate I have ton of things on my list to do this weekend...

• Go to a family Bon Fire out in the middle of the country. Hope to get so wasted that I forget what a shitty week at work this actually was. Have visuals of pushing those unpleasant cousins in while they are acting the fool and standing too close... **snicker** I am kidding you know!!! Or am I????
• Sleep!!! I am going to sleep. How much am I going to sleep? Who cares as long as I am doing it!
• Drink mucho mucho mucho... Time to crack open one of those cheap ass boxes of wine and get just hammered while listening to some awesome music.
• Watch Michael do exactly what I am doing except he will be dancing. I will make sure to take some video or something cuz it's quite comical.
• Watch the Chiefs game and pray they win again this week. And if they do start to suck, it's a good thing I have the Family Guy cartoon to fall back on...
• Sleep somemore..
• Watch some porn. Yeah that's right. I said watch porn. And while I am at it, I think I will write hustler a letter....

Life is Good!

And I must congratulate my Michael for going into the bosses and demanding more money because they gave it to him... That's why you are my hero!

Have a wonderful weekend everyone and THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!!!

Just gotta Vent a little...

Today I am drained. Today I am mentally and physically exhausted. Today I am.....

Have you ever had to just sit and silently deal with an illness while feeling completely helpless and useless?

This past week has been a little rough on my Michael and today is no exception. A few nights ago Michael became extremely sick for several hours. He got over it a day later but this morning he awoke with that same feeling of weakness and nausea. We had to work this morning so we got up, left and made the 40 minute trek. About 45 minutes after we got there he became incredibly sick and began vomiting again. This bout continued until just a few minutes ago. So we had another round of 4 hours of nothing but getting sick.

All I could do was sit back, watch, hold his hand, run my fingers through his hair and get him anything he needed.

I hate that.... I hate it SO much....

This morning was tough because every time he gets sick it scares me tremendously. Normally, I handle it really well. I take care of him and I do it because I love him dearly. But this morning, I broke down. I seriously broke down and cried.

It's hard watching him go through this knowing there is nothing that I can do to magically make it go away or even take it on myself so he doesn't have to deal with it anymore. Of course he would tell you himself he would never wish this disease upon even his worst enemy, but I would still take away his pain if I could. His poor body has been raked over the coals for years and in all honesty, its truly taking its toll. Don't get me wrong, Michael is in very good shape for someone living with Type 1 Diabetes Mellitus. But this disease has really done a number on him.

Diabetic Neuropathy.... Nerve Damage.... I think this is the worst part of the disease. Just from watching Michael over the last few months I truly believe this is what makes his condition so unbearable. Diabetes causes severe complications with the nerve receptors in the body making it difficult to cope with everyday things whether it be loud noises, having too many people around or just being able to sense if his blood sugar levels are too high or too low.

You see, when he gets sick....HE REALLY GETS SICK!!! The vomiting is almost always very violent and uncontrollable for several hours and this morning was no exception. I can deal with watching him get sick and cleaning up after it all but what got to me this morning was simply wondering why this has to happen to him.

It's unfair. It's so completely unfair. He is such a wonderful man and he doesn't deserve this. I know, no one does but I guess when it hits so close to home that Diabetes becomes something so much more than just a word or an illness. It's very real and it's very scary. It's debilitating. It's life changing. It's inconvenient. It's terminal. To be very blunt, it's a slow painful death. And that is something he will tell you himself.

I want to make it very well known that Michael is truly the strongest person I have ever known, not only physically but mentally as well. And when I see him get sick it kills me inside as it does him. Michael does not ever like to feel or appear weak because that is not who he is but this fucking disease drains him. It exhausts him. It takes from him and that is what hurts the most.

I hate this disease but at the same time, it is a part of him. It makes him who he is and that is just a spectacular human being who looks at life as we all should. All Michael wants out of his life is happiness and love and nothing more. As long as he wakes every day and takes a breath he knows he has accomplished something monumental and that is being able to live.

Michael is my hero and my personal guardian angel. I have never loved anyone as much as I love him and I never will. How we ever came sweeping into each others lives I will never know and honestly I don't care. It happened and that is all that matters. We love each other and we are happy. That is what life is all about.

My love for you is a journey;
Starting at forever,
And ending at never.
~ by Anonymous ~

I realize this is long winded but today I just needed to vent. I needed to just get it all out because this disease of his takes it toll on all of us and if I kept it all in he would kick me for it. He always says that if you need to vent then do it because keeping it in does no one any good at all. He is right. He is so right.

Changes...

When I sit back and think about how everything has changed over the past 12 months it almost makes my head spin. I mean literally spin!

If you would have asked me 12 months ago what my life would be like right now, I would not have had any idea to even tell you it would be what it is today.

So many changes...

Some Good...

Some Bad...

But considering they make me who I am today, whether they were good or bad doesn't really matter does it?

Yesterday yet another change presented itself to me. Its a good change too.

I have been sick off and on since October. I have had surgery and been put on medicine that has done a number on me and due to all of this, I was on the verge of losing my job. The thought of that even happening was scary for me because I have never been fired from anywhere for any reason. In fact, I always prided myself on being a hard worker. One who went above and beyond what most others would because, well I just wanted to. It made me feel good to feel like I was making a difference somewhere. Does that make sense???

Well this week I became sick again. I ended up with a massive infection and honestly, its really taken its toll on me. I feel weak and I hate feeling weak. I am tired and have no energy. I don't like that.

Yesterday morning I called in for the 2nd day in a row and was rewarded with phone calls back to my home by a co-worker who was less than nice. And what made it worse is that all of this occurred before I was even scheduled to be at work. I don't need to be berated as if I were a 10 year old child and then hung up on. Its unprofessional and it speaks volumes at the same time. I was treated as if I had just decided to take a few days off and claim to be sick while I was out having some terrific time. If only that were the case.

So I sat back yesterday morning and began to evaluate it all and came to the conclusion I was much better than the way I was being treated. I started looking all over the internet for a different job. I was applying everywhere and anywhere. Anything would have been fine.

Suddenly one popped up and I was given the option to either apply online or call in. So I called in and talked to the girl. As crazy as it sounds, I was pretty much offered the job over the phone. Not only will it be steady hours with the potential for much overtime, but it also pays more. A great deal more. There is so much room to advance and that is what I love the most.

Yesterday afternoon I went out for a quick interview (which I was even late for by 20 minutes...go figure...road construction and wrong directions!) but I was offered the job on the spot and told to come in for an orientation today which I will be leaving for in about 45 minutes. I am going to start the new job on Monday.

I am more than excited!

I got up this morning and went into work and quit my job. Usually I am one for giving notice and doing things the right way but I couldn't let this opportunity slip out of my reach. Its too good...

General Lee acted just as I pretty much expected him too. He really didn't care even though he said he was sad to see me go because he thinks I am an asset to his company. He sure has a funny way of showing it but whatever. I laid it all out on the table as to why I was quitting and all he could do was interrupt me. I finally asked him if I could just speak for a second but that was so hard for him. He kept going "uh-huh" while shaking his weaselly little head with his chipmunk teeth and glaring at me with his beady little eyes.

I was surprised that some of the people who I thought would be jerks about me quitting were actually pretty good about it. I was told I would be missed and wished the best of luck....

It felt good...

I felt empowered...

I will miss my sister though. She and I have become so close working together but she also knows what an incredible opportunity this is for me.

I am thankful for the job I had but only because of what it brought me in terms of a relationship with my sister. She is truly a great person... I love her dearly...

But now its off to much better surroundings...

Life is good...

I am happy...

Sand, Sea Shells and Memories

I have really missed doing the blogs. I had a great one not so long ago but personal problems I was having in my life sent me spiraling out of control and I deleted it. It was something I regretted not long after because it was my outlet. It was my personal journal. It was my life.

But no more. I am back and I am happy! No matter what I am going through in my life I know without a doubt my life is good. I have a terrific family, my incredible son and a wonderful friend in NV. But there is one more in my life who has meant so much and that is Michael, my best friend, my strength, my one and only, my forever and always......Simply, the love of my life.

While I was at my lowest in the last couple of weeks, everyone mentioned above did everything they could to help me get my strength back and become even stronger than I ever thought possible and for that I say 'Thank You'!!! Everything all of you have done for me means the world and I will never forget it...... I promise you that.

Recently, I have had to really look at myself and decide what was most important to me. Anyone who has done that knows how truly hard it is to sit back and examine yourself underneath a microscope, not leaving anything unturned. These last few weeks were in fact the hardest 2 weeks of my entire life but now that its all over I am moving forward and will never look back again.

Unfortunately, I shut everyone who meant something to me out of my life during this time and that is what saddens me most of all. I listened to no one except someone who did nothing but lie and manipulate me in the worst of ways. And to think I allowed it to happen.

During those couple of weeks I received a package in the mail that made it all so clear. When I pulled the package out of my mailbox I immediately ran into my bedroom where I could be alone and opened it. Tucked inside were the following items: A letter, A very unique Zippo lighter and a quaint little box. I opened up the little box and gazed upon the smoothest sand I have ever seen and some sea shells.



Michael, thank you for sending me these and reminding my darkened mind of what is truly important in my life. I love you so much.... You saved me from myself when I needed it most and for that I will always be thankful. Always know it was never you that I doubted, only myself. Getting this package sent my mind back to when you were here with me. Every second we were together flashed before my eyes in a matter of seconds..... It made me feel safe, warm, comfortable and most of all loved! Now as you have said to me so many times lately, 'Let's get this party started!' cuz I am more than ready....

So rest assured everyone, I am back and I am happy... Life is good!